Having recently moved from suburbia, into a downtown apartment, the newly located young man got a phone call from his old, next door neighbor. “So,” he said, “how do you like apartment living, now that you’re in the big city?”
The young man replied, “Well, my neighbors are terribly noisy people. The one on one side keeps banging on the wall all night. I can hear the one on the other side screaming all night. The people upstairs hammer on the floor all night”
“That’s terrible!” says the old, suburbanite neighbor. “How do you manage to put up with such noisy neighbors?”
“I don’t do anything. I just keep turning up the volume on my stereo.”
Personally, in my own defense of being this said noisy neighbor; I once had a neighbor, and whenever he would knock on the wall, I knew he wanted me to turn my music down. After having this happen for a while, the next time he knocked on the wall, I messed with his head by yelling, “No ones home!”
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Learn the rule of 7
Remember that most people are home during the hours of 7p.m.-7a.m.
Be aware that if you’re at home your neighbors are most likely as well.
If you can hear them, they can hear you!
When you can hear your neighbors banging around, then remember that they can hear you too!
The Normal Neighborly Noises:
Battle of the Blaring Bands.
Yes, you have the right to listen to your favorite music, but do you have the right to listen to it at your favorite volume. If you have to listen to it loud, remember the rule of 7. If you really want to be a great neighbor, buy yourself some wireless head phones. That way you can listen to the music anywhere in the house, and many of the new wireless head phones have better acoustical sound than your stereo.
High Heels.
Ladies and gentlemen, no mater if you’re an upstairs neighbor, downstairs or to the side, your shoes can be heard on the floor, especially hard-wood floors. Be a good neighbor and take off your shoes at the door. If you have the need to wear shoes in your apartment, have some warm slippers or comfortable sandals waiting for you when you come in.
Slamming Doors and Cupboards.
How much more effort does it take to quietly pull the door behind you? In the kitchen, don’t let loose of the cupboard doors letting them slam shut. Especially if you have a cheap landlord that didn’t put handles on the kitchen cabinets.
Television Volume.
Again, remember the rule of 7. Don’t keep your television volume higher than needed. If your apartment space makes it hard to hear the TV or if you’re a little hard of hearing as I am, purchase some wireless directional speakers to place behind your seating area or buy a wireless system with comfortable ear buds. Many wireless systems have both directional speakers and personal listening devices. Great for when others are in the house not watching TV or for when you’re moving room to room doing chores.
Late Night TV.
Some of us need to have the television on to help put us to sleep. Remember to keep the volume down as low as you can and remember to set the automatic shut off timer when you jump into bed.
Barking Dogs. The nation’s number one complaint!
Everyone hates the sound of the neighbor’s dog(s) barking! EVERYONE! Even the people that own dogs! If you own a dog do everything you can to keep them from barking. Train your dogs not to bark. “But I have them for protection against break ins! Then move to a safer building, Us neighbors don’t care. Even one yip can be irritating. Buy a dog training book, watch the “Dog Whisper”, get an electronic, dog barker shocker, just do something to stop the dog from barking!
Arguments and Loud talkers.
It happens, you and your roommate, partner or spouse will sooner or later get into an argument. Don’t yell! Learn the rules of how to argue. Using your quiet voice is more effective in getting your opinion heard. This can be a hard lesson to practice, especial if you’re of Irish or Italian heritage!
How to Confront a Noisy Neighbor.
What not to say: Hey, you rotten, putrid, meat bag, wrapped in human flesh. Your TV/Music is to *&%$#@ LOUD!
What to say: I was wonder, is my TV/Music too loud for you? (Thereby, starting conversation about the noise, in a neighborly way) I worried that you can hear it in your apartment. (A sly hint for them to talk about their own TV/Music volume)
What not to say: If I hear your mangy, flea bitten mutt bark again, I’m going to call the cops or plug’em with my pellet gun!
What to say: What a nice dog you have, it sure seems very protective of you, with its barking at most any sounds. (Most dog owners will get the hint, most dog owners are already aware of the problem.) Tell them a story about how you once had a neighbor with a dog, and how they trained it not to bark cept when really needed. Let them know that there are books to help them train a dog not only not to stop barking, but how to do lots of cool tricks too.
Confronting a noisy neighbor is hard, but not if you do it politely and gently, remembering; To make good neighbors, be a good neighbor.
