Education is an investment for the future.

Money is not the reason that people enter teaching. But it is a reason why some talented people avoid teaching--or quit the profession when starting a family or buying a home. Other high-performing nations recruit teachers from the top third of college graduates. That must be our goal as well, and compensation is one critical factor. To encourage more top-caliber students to choose teaching, teachers should be paid a lot more, with starting salaries more in the range of $60,000 and potential earnings of as much as $150,000.

Great teachers stand at the summit of one of the hardest, most challenging, and most consequential professions for our children and the country's future economic prosperity. They deserve our respect and should be well-remunerated. Nevertheless, through tortured analysis, and in some instances a disregard of their own data, the authors of this new study reach a predictably contrary conclusion.

Traditionally, economists have analyzed teacher pay the same way they analyze pay in other professions--they have compared the pay of teachers to workers with similar education and work experience. Like many before them, Richwine and Biggs found that teachers did indeed receive lower pay than similarly educated workers -- almost 20 percent lower.

I agree that educational credentials are not the best measures of teacher effectiveness -- but the researchers go on to assert that teachers should not be compared to workers with similar educational credentials because teachers do not score as well on the Armed Forces Qualifications Test. Setting aside the fact that the AFQT does not measure teacher effectiveness, it is insulting and demeaning to argue that teachers are not smart enough to receive market compensation comparable to their peers based on the results of a test that most of them took as teenagers.

The researchers also ignored a chart in their own paper showing that teachers have similar overall benefit packages to private employees. Unhappy with those findings, they then exaggerated the value of teacher compensation by comparing the retirement benefits of the small minority of teachers who stay in the classroom for 30 years, rather than comparing the pension benefits for the typical teacher to their peers in other professions.

Finally, they appeared to create out of thin air an 8.6 percent "job security" salary premium for teachers -- despite the fact that hundreds of thousands of education jobs were lost in the recession and teachers continue to face layoffs.

By the end of this decade, more than half of America's 3.2 million teachers are expected to retire. That demographic shift presents a stiff challenge and a special opportunity. States, districts, and schools have a once-in-a-lifetime chance to modernize the teaching profession and expand the talent pool. But doing so will require dramatic change in the way we recruit, train, support, evaluate, and compensate teachers.

I agree with Richwine and Biggs on one point. If teachers are to be recognized and compensated as professionals, states and school districts must shift away from a blue-collar assembly line model of compensation--and do more to reward effectiveness and performance in the classroom. A performance-based compensation model will enable great teachers to earn more, justify higher salaries, and raise the stature of the profession.

Americans need and deserve an honest, open debate about the teaching profession, framed by evidence, not ideologically-tilted studies like this one. The debate in Washington today should be about how to judiciously invest in education. How can we best modernize schools with crumbling infrastructure so they can teach 21st century skills? How can we keep teachers in classrooms, instead of on unemployment lines? And yes--even when budgets are tight--how can we make teaching a more attractive career and elevate the profession?

The answer to these questions cannot be to cut teacher pay and put tens of thousands of teachers out of work. Even in a time of fiscal austerity, education is more than just an expense. It's an investment in the future.


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GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know.  I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.  I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome.  My name is Rose.  I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.  "Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a couple of children, and then retire and travel."

"No seriously," I asked.  I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared chocolate milkshake.  We became instant friends.  Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop.  I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.  She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students.  She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us.  She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.  As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.  Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me!  I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.  There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy and achieving success.  You have to laugh and find humor every day.  You've got to have a dream.  When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.  If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.  If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.  Anybody can grow older.  That doesn't take any talent or ability.  The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change.

Have no regrets.  The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do.  The only people who fear death are those with regrets."  She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."  She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.  One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

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Tracey Gilmour Whelpley of “The Lunch Studio” restaurant.

The very first place I sat down for lunch in downtown, Flint after having spent 26 years out of state, was at The Lunch Studio. I loved the decor and atmosphere and was very glad to find they served a pork sandwich (They have veggy foods too) very similar to the Cuba Sandwich which I love, called a Midnight. My asking if they could add and subtract a few items in recreating my favorite sandwich, received an excited, positive, “YUP.”

As I sat and enjoyed the sandwich while I took in the all the artwork and do dads within the room, I could not help but overhear a group of young man at the table next to me. Their conversation was full of excitement about how they might put together a social organization that would help low-income folks with getting home mortgages, and education on personal budgeting and finance. (This was the formation of the group then call “PLUTO” which later enfolded into the Genesee Regional Chamber of Commerce as their Young Professionals Committee, GRYP) I introduced myself to the group and we formed a friendship. (I love these guys.)

Here’s my point; from the very first moment I arrived in my old hometown and walked through downtown, Flint, I could feel the place was full of vibrate energy and opportunity. I decided to relocate in downtown. The very first place I interacted (The Lunch Studio) was also full of that same enthusiasm and optimism.

It wasn’t till later that I got to meet the lady behind the counter, Tracey Gilmour Whelpley. That’s when I discovered that her small restaurant that was so full of enthusiasm and optimism was an extension of her own personality.

You may only know Tracey as the quiet woman who lovingly makes each of our sandwiches, but in real life, she’s a superhero in downtown, Flint. Behind the scenes, she’s an intricate piece to countless fundraiser for our community. She gives her time, money and yes, even the food we enjoy at many of the community social function/fundraisers.

It would be enough that downtown, Flint has a great restaurant and meeting place, but having one owned by a person of such grace and compassion for this city is amazing!

I want to personally thank you Tracey, for all you’ve done for me and my wife, and I want to corporately thank you from the whole of the City, for 10 years of community service. Congratulation, keep up the good work!

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When you say things in anger, they leave a scar.

NAIL IN THE FENCE

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His Father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the
 next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold  his temper than to drive those nails into the fence. Finally the day came when the boy didn't lose his temper at all.

He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, "You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.

When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won't matter how many times you say I'm sorry, the wound is still there." A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one."

Friends are very rare jewels, indeed. They make you smile and encourage you to succeed. They lend an ear, they share words of praise and they always want to open their hearts to us."


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Teachers teach because they're teachers......

Teachers, facing low salaries, opt to moonlight

Nov. 11, 2011, 11:47 a.m. EST

AP

MIAMI (AP) — By day, Wade Brosz teaches American history at an A-rated Florida middle school. By night, he is a personal trainer at 24 Hour Fitness.

Brosz took the three-night a week job at the gym after his teaching salary was frozen, summer school was reduced drastically, and the state bonus for board certified teachers was cut. He figures that he and his wife, also a teacher, are making about $20,000 less teaching than expected to, combined.

"The second job was to get back what was lost through cuts," said Brosz, a nationally board certified teacher. "It was tougher and tougher to make ends meet. I started personal training because it's flexible hours."

Second jobs are not a new phenomenon for teachers, who have historically been paid less than other professionals. In 1981, about 11 percent of teachers were moonlighting; the number has risen to about one in five today. They are bartenders, waitresses, tutors, school bus drivers and even lawnmowers.

Now, with the severe cuts many school districts have made, teachers like Brosz, who hadn't considered juggling a second job before, are searching the want ads. The number of public school teachers who reported holding a second job outside school increased slightly from 2003-04 to 2007-08. While there is no national data for more recent years, reports from individual states and districts indicate the number may have climbed further since the start of the recession.

In Texas, for example, the percentage of teachers who moonlight has increased from 22 percent in 1980 to 41 percent in 2010.

"It's the economy, primarily," said Sam Sullivan, a professor at Sam Houston State University, which conducts the survey.

Rita Haecker, president of the Texas State Teachers Association, said cuts in education have forced many teachers to take furlough days. It's an extra strain because, unlike in the past, many teachers are now the primary breadwinner, either because they are a single parent or their spouse is unemployed, Haecker said.

"It affects their morale in the classroom," she said. "The last thing we want is our teachers worried about how they are going to pay their bills."

The average salary for a public school teacher nationwide in the 2009-10 school year was $55,350, a figure that has remained relatively flat, after being adjusted for inflation, over the last two decades. Starting teacher salaries can be significantly lower; compared to college graduates in other professions, they earn more than $10,000 less when beginning their careers.

"I think people have felt the need to supplement their teaching salaries in order to have a middle class lifestyle," said Lawrence Mishel, president of the Economic Policy Institute, which published a study this year concluding the average weekly pay of teachers in 2010 was about 12 percent below that of workers with similar education and experience.

The Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development, which collects data on student performance across the globe, advised the United States earlier this year to work at elevating the teaching profession in order to improve student performance. The recommendations included measures like raising the bar for who is selected to become a teacher, providing better training and better pay. In many nations where students outperform the U.S. in reading, math and science, including Japan and South Korea, teachers earn more than they do in the United States.

"International comparisons show that in the countries with the highest performance, teachers are typically paid better relative to others, education credentials are valued more, and a higher share of educational spending is devoted to instructional services than is the case in the United States," the OECD report concluded.

While moonlighting isn't unique to teachers, they do tend to have second or third jobs at a higher rate than other professionals. One researcher estimates their moonlighting rates may be four times higher than those of other full-time, college educated salaried workers.

Eleanor Blair Hilty, an education professor at Western Carolina University, said most teachers make around $5,000 through outside work. Yet when asked if they would quit if given a raise in the equivalent amount, most said no. Her conclusion: teachers are getting something more from their second job other than an extra paycheck.

"A lot of it has to do with what I think is wrong with the teaching profession," Hilty said, noting that teachers have little autonomy and control over what and how they teach. "They found their moonlighting jobs to be satisfying."

Policies on moonlighting vary by district; some have no written guidelines, while others merely advise teachers to ensure any outside work doesn't interfere with their duties at school.

In North Carolina, a survey conducted in 2007 found 72 percent of teachers moonlight, whether it's an after-school job or summer employment.

"There's a culture of silence," Hilty said. "Everybody knows that moonlighting goes on and they know it's part of what teachers do but nobody likes to talk about it very much."

Michelle Hartman, a language arts and science teacher at a Plantation, Fla., elementary school, is balancing two other jobs, one as an organist with the local Presbyterian church, playing at church services, weddings and funerals, and another doing janitorial work twice a week at her father's accounting firm.

The single mother has a master's degree in educational leadership and has been a teacher 15 years. But she says she cannot afford to leave any of her extra jobs, which she said brings in about $6,000 year, in addition to her $46,000 teaching salary.

"I'm tired some days," Hartman said. "But no matter what, it doesn't matter because I know I need to be there for the students."

Yet working an extra job inevitably does take a toll. On top of their work in the classroom, teachers have to grade papers and plan lessons — work they often do at home. One study on teachers who moonlight in Texas cited the case of a teacher who ended up grading papers at the restaurant where she worked. The same study found that all the teachers interviewed reported that moonlighting had a negative effect on their health. In the Texas survey, a majority said moonlighting was detrimental to their work in the classroom.

"Yes, they go 100 percent, but they're still tired," said Dave Henderson, a retired professor who worked on the study for many years.

Albert Ochoa, a middle school art and publications teacher in Austin, Texas, works at least five hours a night at UPS as a shipper, a job he's had since graduating from college in 1977. Even though he is now toward the higher end of the teacher salary schedule, he said he cannot afford to quit either job.

He said he'd have to earn another $2,000 a month in order to support his wife, who is on medical disability, and son, and not work a second job. "I've had opportunities to go work full time at UPS and do other things," Ochoa said. "But I enjoy what I do. I like teaching."

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Positive Thoughts from Eleanor Roosevelt .

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.  To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart. Anger is only one letter short of danger.  If someone betrays you once, it is his fault; if he betrays you twice, it is your fault.  Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.  He who loses money, loses much; he, who loses a friend, loses much more; He, who loses faith, loses all.  Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art.  Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.  Friends, you and me - you brought another friend - and then there were 3. We started our group - our circle of friends - and like that circle - there is no beginning, nor an end.  Yesterday is history - tomorrow is a mystery - today is a gift

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Charter school money vanishes

By Mike Synan

• FOX 35 News

ORANGE COUNTY, Fla. (WOFL FOX 35) - What happens to your tax money when a charter school goes out of business? A Fox 35 investigation reveals the money just simply vanishes and it is costing taxpayers millions in Orange and Seminole County. The number for Orange County alone is $34 million over the past 10 years. Orange School Board Chairman Bill Sublette wants more control.

"It's very very frustrating because this state is wasting untold tens of millions of dollars on what are really ill conceived experiments."

He's not opposed to the concept; he's worried about an increasing number of charter schools without the tools necessary to succeed even from the start

"We're not opposed to charter schools in Orange County Public Schools. We have 30 of them and we have some fine ones, but what we have noticed is a flood of charter applicants that have no real education experience, no real financial backing, and no expertise in managing large budgets and we're talking about large sums of tax payer money going to these charter school operators."

In Seminole County $24 million was given to charter schools that are no longer in existence. State Senator David Simmons of Altamonte Springs is a big supporter of charter schools for parents to have options.

"We want them to know that they have an excellent opportunity with traditional schools if they want to stay there, but we want to provide them the choice if they want it."

Charter schools have completely different standards than public schools. For example they can choose how many students to test and can set their own school standards outside of what would be a public school's grading system. If Bill Sublette knows a charter school is in trouble, not much can be done.

"We've also been frustrated that we can't shut down quickly a failing charter school.... It angers me and it angers the Board when we see tens of millions of dollars, of tax dollars being wasted on charter schools"

Even State Senator David Simmons, a strong proponent now agrees, more must be done to rein in charter schools to keep your tax dollars from just vanishing into thin air.

"I expect them to be accountable just like traditional schools are accountable."

Charter schools are set to get the most money they've ever received from the state in the upcoming budget year.

Read more: http://www.myfoxorlando.com/dpp/news/local/111711-charter-school-money-vanishes#.TtpAQLpjMf4.facebook#ixzz1fgTboVwv

Michigan’s embarrassing school reform legislation. We can do better!

Michigan’s embarrassing school reform legislation

By Valerie Strauss

Michigan sometimes gets short shrift in school reform news, what with all of the publicity given this year to Wisconsin — where some Democratic legislators left the state to avoid a vote on Gov. Scott Walker’s efforts to restrict collective bargaining rights of teachers — and to Ohio, where Gov. John Kasich just saw voters repeal his effort to curb collective bargaining for public sector workers.

But it shouldn’t. Michigan’s legislature this year has been considered a host of Republican-sponsored bills that public school advocates see as attacks on schools and teachers.

The most controversial are a bill that lifts the cap on the number of charter schools in the state and another that does the same for virtual schools. The legislation, includes very little, if any, quality controls on charters and virtual schools. In other words, just about anything goes.

Joy Resmovits at the Huffington Post wrote in this story detailing Michigan Republican legislators’ reform efforts, that even big supporters of charters and virtual education are opposed to the legislation and that efforts to improve the bills have so far been unsuccessful.

She quoted Harrison Blackmond, who heads the pro-charter Democrats for Education Reform efforts in Michigan, as saying: "Our organization and other organizations that we're working with are not against lifting the charter-school cap. The other side is trying to paint us that way. Our issue is: How do you go about doing this in such a way that it protects children?”

Meanwhile, there is no research showing the effectiveness of full-time virtual schools anywhere, and some critics are opposed to for-profit companies having a big role in public education. Most of the charters in Michigan are now operated by for-profit businesses.

Both bills, having passed the Senate, are now up for a vote in the House, where highly conservative Republican Rep. Tom McMillin now runs the education committee. He stepped in when voters earlier this month recalled panel chair Rep. Paul Scott, who had pushed through legislation that reformed teacher tenure earlier this year and won K-12 funding cuts. McMillin is expected to continue Scott’s agenda.

The tenure legislation, among other things, makes it easier to fire teachers and requires that 50 percent of teacher evaluations be based on student standardized test scores by 2016, an assessment method that experts say is not sophisticated enough for high-stakes use. It also ends using seniority as the basis of staffing decisions.

But that’s not all. Michigan’s legislators are also considering bills that would strip local districts of their local control and further erode collective bargaining. They include one that allows private and home-schooled students to take elective courses in any private, charter or public school in their district — a move that critics say is nothing more than a voucher scheme. The bill that would have required that school districts admit out-of-district students — which is now voluntary — has stalled in committee.

There are other bills, some less controversial than others. But all in all, Michigan is right up there in the category of really bad school reform legislation.

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know.  I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.  I turned around to find a
wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, "Hi handsome.  My name is Rose.  I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?"
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.  "Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.
She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a couple of children, and then retire and travel."
"No seriously," I asked.  I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.
"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building and shared chocolate milkshake.  We became instant friends.  Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop.  I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.  She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students.  She was living it
up.
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us.  She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.  As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped
her three by five cards on the floor.  Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me!  I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.  There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy and achieving success.  You
have to laugh and find humor every day.  You've got to have a dream.  When you lose your dreams, you die.
We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.  If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.  If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.  Anybody can grow older.  That doesn't take any talent or ability.  The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change.
Have no regrets.  The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do.  The only people who fear death are those with regrets."  She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The
Rose."  She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.
At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.  One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

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Think About your Attitude

Think About your Attitude

Michael is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say.

When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, "If I were any better, I would be twins!"

He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Michael was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation. Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Michael and asked him, "I don't get it! You can't be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?"

Michael replied, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood. I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or...I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or... I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested.

"Yes, it is," Michael said. "Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's your choice how you live your life."

I reflected on what Michael said. Soon hereafter, I left the Tower Industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but I often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it.

Several years later, I heard that Michael was involved in a serious accident, falling some 60 feet from a communications tower.

After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care. Michael was released from the hospital with rods placed in his back. I saw Michael about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, "If I were any better, I'd be twins. Wanna see my scars?"

I declined to see his wounds, but I did ask him what had gone through his mind as the accident took place.

"The first thing that went through my mind was the well-being of my soon to be born daughter, " Michael replied. "Then, as I play on the ground, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live or ...I could choose to die. I chose to live."

"Weren't you scared? Did you lose consciousness?" I asked.

Michael continued, "...the paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the ER and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared.
In their eyes, I read "he's a dead man. I knew I needed to take action."

"What did you do?" I asked.

"Well, there was a big burly nurse shouting questions at me, said Michael. "She asked if I was allergic to anything. "Yes, I replied."

The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply. I took a deep breath and yelled,"Gravity."

Over their laughter, I told them, "I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead."

Michael lived, thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34

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What Chicks talk about...and talk... and talk....

My wife had “The Girls” Wednesday night meeting at our home last night. I holed up in my “Man Cave” aka “Prayer Room.” Although my cave was a distance for where the girls gathered I could still hear the din of their voices and the crescendo of their laughter and giggles. It was a good sound. It felt good knowing that the women where having a fun time together away from their normal day-to-day routine.

After they toured our home and chitchatted, I could feel the house quieting down as they hunkered down within the living room. (Okay, so maybe woman don’t “hunker down” maybe it’s better to say they settled down and nested. Okay so maybe I shouldn’t use the word “nested” either, it sounds so male chauvinistic, let's just say, they all sat down.) Because of the distance from my “Man Cave” and my television being tuned to the baseball game, I could just make out snippets of conversation.  Seems like every sentence that I could make out started with…. “Then he said….” (inaudible) followed by group LAUGHTER! Or “Then he did this….(inaudible) followed by group LAUGHTER. I couldn’t identify any of the voices that started each of these sentences, but there was a multiple of them, all seemingly telling stories about the men in their lives. Now, my interpretation of these snippets of conversation as being about the male relationships in their lives may come from my own male paranoia, but I strongly believe that they were talking about us guys.  This, I then conclude, that our women find us men, amusing. Understand this, I don’t think the girls were making fun of us or putting us down, they just like to talk about us. What was especially endearing, was the times the sentences started out with the same…. Then he said this, or then he did this…followed by the voices of the other women…. “That’s so sweet”, and Ohs and ahs.

Men, here is something we might need to think about; the woman are watching us and sharing their experiences with other women. This could be a good thing or a bad thing depending on how we treat our spouse or girlfriend, but, the main point is, that woman listen to other woman about their relationships and gauge their own relationships by the action, words and deeds of the men in other woman’s lives.

As the, lets call them, more experienced woman, told the stories of their relationship with men, both the good and the bad, the other ladies’ are thinking over the character of the man and judging if that is how they want their own “Man” to be like. Especial the younger girls, they listen intently to the stories and the reactions from the other women. To me this means these younger girls are building a resume of wants, can live with, and can’t live without qualities they will be looking for within the men they meet and date.

What does this revelation mean to us men? (Guess it’s not a revelation, cause its been the same way since Eve was passing-on her “Adam” stories to her daughters.) Maybe, our treatment of women is a real life reflection of our “Heart” for God. Maybe, a man’s true “Heart” for God can be gauged on our “Heart” for the women in our lives. We men are always saying that we’re striving to be like Jesus, but do we treat our own wife or girlfriend in a way that reflects that?

Ladies, have I even come close to being right on this subject or are you just shaking your heads, sighing a little laugh because I’ve given you another “Man” story! : )

Well, Ladies and Gentleman, no mater what you think about my thoughts written here, I will be retiring to my “Prayer” cave……okay, so it is a “Man” cave….and think more about how I treat my wife and the other women God has brought into my life.  Crap, this could take a long, long time. Wonder what time the ball game starts. 

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Churchill’s, the kind of pub every College Town needs.

Flint, Michigan: I would think that no matter what College you attended there was a Churchill’s type pub in the area. It was the place to let off a little steam, meet with friends, find new friends, share common interest, and maybe even find a date.

Churchill’s if just that kind of place; it’s laid back atmosphere, cheap beer, hot food and good music in the background that’s not so loud that you can’t have a conversation, makes for the perfect college town meeting place.

Flint area college students remember this; someday you’ll be reminiscing about the times you spent in college with the words “Remember the time we were at Churchill’s….” So the next time you’re bored, overwhelmed or feeling a little lonely, stop by Churchill’s Food & Spirits and become part of its history.

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My neighbor is so noisy that……

Having recently moved from suburbia, into a downtown apartment, the newly located young man got a phone call from his old, next door neighbor. “So,” he said, “how do you like apartment living, now that you’re in the big city?”

The young man replied, “Well, my neighbors are terribly noisy people. The one on one side keeps banging on the wall all night. I can hear the one on the other side screaming all night. The people upstairs hammer on the floor all night”

“That’s terrible!” says the old, suburbanite neighbor. “How do you manage to put up with such noisy neighbors?”

“I don’t do anything. I just keep turning up the volume on my stereo.”

Personally, in my own defense of being this said noisy neighbor; I once had a neighbor, and whenever he would knock on the wall, I knew he wanted me to turn my music down. After having this happen for a while, the next time he knocked on the wall, I messed with his head by yelling, “No ones home!”

To make good neighbors, be a good neighbor.

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Learn the rule of 7

Remember that most people are home during the hours of 7p.m.-7a.m.

Be aware that if you’re at home your neighbors are most likely as well.

If you can hear them, they can hear you!

When you can hear your neighbors banging around, then remember that they can hear you too!

The Normal Neighborly Noises:

Battle of the Blaring Bands.

Yes, you have the right to listen to your favorite music, but do you have the right to listen to it at your favorite volume. If you have to listen to it loud, remember the rule of 7. If you really want to be a great neighbor, buy yourself some wireless head phones. That way you can listen to the music anywhere in the house, and many of the new wireless head phones have better acoustical sound than your stereo.

High Heels.

Ladies and gentlemen, no mater if you’re an upstairs neighbor, downstairs or to the side, your shoes can be heard on the floor, especially hard-wood floors. Be a good neighbor and take off your shoes at the door. If you have the need to wear shoes in your apartment, have some warm slippers or comfortable sandals waiting for you when you come in.

Slamming Doors and Cupboards.

How much more effort does it take to quietly pull the door behind you? In the kitchen, don’t let loose of the cupboard doors letting them slam shut. Especially if you have a cheap landlord that didn’t put handles on the kitchen cabinets.

Television Volume.

Again, remember the rule of 7. Don’t keep your television volume higher than needed. If your apartment space makes it hard to hear the TV or if you’re a little hard of hearing as I am, purchase some wireless directional speakers to place behind your seating area or buy a wireless system with comfortable ear buds. Many wireless systems have both directional speakers and personal listening devices. Great for when others are in the house not watching TV or for when you’re moving room to room doing chores.

Late Night TV.

Some of us need to have the television on to help put us to sleep. Remember to keep the volume down as low as you can and remember to set the automatic shut off timer when you jump into bed.

Barking Dogs. The nation’s number one complaint!

Everyone hates the sound of the neighbor’s dog(s) barking! EVERYONE! Even the people that own dogs! If you own a dog do everything you can to keep them from barking. Train your dogs not to bark. “But I have them for protection against break ins! Then move to a safer building, Us neighbors don’t care. Even one yip can be irritating. Buy a dog training book, watch the “Dog Whisper”, get an electronic, dog barker shocker, just do something to stop the dog from barking!

Arguments and Loud talkers.

It happens, you and your roommate, partner or spouse will sooner or later get into an argument. Don’t yell! Learn the rules of how to argue. Using your quiet voice is more effective in getting your opinion heard. This can be a hard lesson to practice, especial if you’re of Irish or Italian heritage!

How to Confront a Noisy Neighbor.

What not to say: Hey, you rotten, putrid, meat bag, wrapped in human flesh. Your TV/Music is to *&%$#@ LOUD!

What to say: I was wonder, is my TV/Music too loud for you? (Thereby, starting conversation about the noise, in a neighborly way) I worried that you can hear it in your apartment. (A sly hint for them to talk about their own TV/Music volume)

What not to say: If I hear your mangy, flea bitten mutt bark again, I’m going to call the cops or plug’em with my pellet gun!

What to say: What a nice dog you have, it sure seems very protective of you, with its barking at most any sounds. (Most dog owners will get the hint, most dog owners are already aware of the problem.) Tell them a story about how you once had a neighbor with a dog, and how they trained it not to bark cept when really needed. Let them know that there are books to help them train a dog not only not to stop barking, but how to do lots of cool tricks too.

Confronting a noisy neighbor is hard, but not if you do it politely and gently, remembering; To make good neighbors, be a good neighbor.

I believe he’s right!

You can’t help but admire this dynamic young man at the height of his career. I remember when he was just a little guy and then through his problems in high school and college. Somehow he’s gotten himself together and now, not only owns his own successful business but has become a leader in the community. We were sitting together in a coffee shop, just shooting the crap, when I just blurted out “You know, I remember you as a pretty messed up kid, what changed you?” He replied, “I read a book that taught me to believe in myself.” He continued, now with a softer voice, “I found a verse in the Bible, and I struck me deeply.”

STOP! Dear readers, I not going to get all religious on you here. That is what he said. So….

I asked, “What verse was that?”

Without blinking an eye he recited quickly, “If you can believe, all things are possible to him that believes. Mark 9:23”

I believe he’s right!

How many self-help books have you read without having read the Bible as one? Don’t discount a book because of some stigma you hold for it. My personal library contains books from many faiths and religions. You never know, this one might be the one that strikes you deeply.

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Don't Celebrate Valentine's Day.

I know this couple who don't celebrate Valentine's Day.

These happily married people--call them Nick and Nora.

Nick and Nora laugh about not celebrating Valentine's Day; it's sort of a private joke.

What they do is treat each other well during the year. They go places, enjoy each others' company, and even buy the occasional bouquet of flowers. Occasionally one does the others' chore, simply to be nice. When one has a cold, the other makes soup. They notice when the other one has a new haircut or pair of shoes. They point out interesting magazine articles the other probably wouldn't see.

So what they do on Valentine's Day is pretty much what they do on other days.

Editor: So maybe Valentine's Day was just created as a Hallmark Moment! Or, that it's a day that reminds us how crappy we've treated each other the other 364 days of the year.

Read part of this book by opening this page.
















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